Until she was 40 years old, Melanie Goodwin had no memory of her life before the age of 16. Then, a family tragedy triggered a cataclysmic psychological change. Suddenly she was aware of other identities inside her, and the barriers between them were crumbling. The different identities belonged to her, Melanie felt, but \u2018her\u2019 at different ages, from three years old to 16 and on into adulthood.<\/p>\n
These ages were not random. Amid the confusing, terrifying mingling of different voices in one consciousness came memories of child abuse, the first episode occurring when she was three, the last when she was 16. \u201cI have no proof,\u201d she notes. \u201cI have to go with what I believe happened, and my reality.\u201d<\/p>\n
Melanie has what used to be called multiple personality disorder, which is now more commonly referred to as dissociative identity disorder (DID). The change in name reflects an understanding that it\u2019s more than just changes in personality that are involved. Memories, behaviours, attitudes, perceived age \u2013 all can switch together.<\/p>\n
\u201cWe\u201d \u2013 she generally refers to herself as \u2018we\u2019 \u2013 \u201chad lots of adult parts. Development should be seamless\u2026 But because we didn\u2019t grow up naturally, we would update ourselves\u2026 Finally, there were nine different adult parts, each managing a stage of our abuse-free adult life.\u201d<\/p>\n